What Is And What Is Not Self-Esteem? By Andrea Scarsi

Self-esteem is how we evaluate ourselves; it is the way we perceive our value in the world and how much importance we think we have for others. Self-esteem influences our trust in others, in our relationships, and work; practically in almost every side of our life. Positive self-esteem gives us the strength and flexibility to take charge of our lives and grow from our mistakes, without the fear of rejection.

Here are some outward signs of positive self-esteem. Trust, clarity of direction, non-blaming behaviour, awareness of personal strengths, the ability to make mistakes and learn from these, the ability to accept the mistakes of others, optimism, the ability to solve problems, an independent and cooperative attitude, feeling comfortable with a wide range of emotions, the ability to trust others, a good sense of personal limits, good self-care, the ability to say no

What is low self-esteem? Low self-esteem is a debilitating condition that prevents us from realizing our full potential. People with low self-esteem feel unworthy, incapable and incompetent and because they are so ill with themselves, most of the time enter a downward circuit that feeds negativity to feed on it, to the point of forgetting that one can also live well.

Here are some signs of low self-esteem. A negative vision of life, a perfectionist attitude, be wary of others even those who show signs of affection, blaming behavior, fear of taking risks, feeling of not being loved and lovable, addiction, letting others make decisions, fear of being ridiculed.

How to increase low self-esteem? Feelings of low self-esteem often accumulate in the course of one’s life and let go of such deep-rooted crystallization is a difficult task that requires time, effort, and even professional assistance. There are, however, before getting to the last step, some simple, positive thinking techniques that can be used to help improve one’s own self-esteem. These are called affirmations and are used to stop negative internal dialogue in an easy and constructive way.

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The affirmations are encouraging messages that we give to ourselves every day until they become part of our feelings, beliefs, and internal dialogue. The statements work best when we are in a relaxed state, but because when we give negative messages we are often in agitation, it is necessary to immediately counteract them with positive ones, wherever we are and whatever we are doing. For example, replace the message: I made a stupid mistake and I’m not good at this job or game, with, OK, I made a mistake, but I learned from it and now I can do a better job or play. We start each day looking in the mirror and giving us a positive message.

The following statements help us to work towards a positive image of us: I respect myself and respect others, I am a lovable and nice person, I trust and it shows, I’m counting on me, I create loving and healthy relationships, I’m a nice person to have as a friend, I accept myself as I am, I think big, I love myself, life is beautiful and I like being a part of it.

It is enough just to believe in it, keep the positive intent and radiate it. It is easy and even if we fall back into the old habit every now and then, it is enough to leave it from time to time faster, until it becomes a distant memory that we no longer remember that once belonged to us and we are happy. It’s not just simple, it’s obvious, and the obvious, we know, is unbeatable.

Dr. Andrea Scarsi (Sandesh) is a mystic writer and musician and a spiritual counselor who uses his works to share a dimension of being and lifestyle that are based on meditation and communion with the absolute. Born in Venice, Italy, in 1955, in the years he deepens different meditative techniques for awakening consciousness, energy balancing, and personal evolution that he practices and teaches. Check out his work and books at Books by Andrea Scarsi.

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